as we press

View Original

failures: coming again and again

Have you ever felt like you just mess up more than you get it right?  

At times, I sure have!  In marriage, parenting, friendships, family relationships and even decisions; no area of life seems immune!  It can be tough to not allow the guilt or remorse swallow you whole and leave you in a self-inflicted prison of guilt and shame.

My husband, David, and I often jokingly ask each other “When are we going to be able to actually apply all these lessons we keep learning from our mistakes?” Do you ever have those days where it just seems like all of life is falling apart? Where the thought of going back to bed to start over (or possibly just close out the day) seems very appealing?

Intentionally Designed

Hear this truth!  This is the Gospel at work! 

God has intentionally designed all of us and our days to fail apart from Him!  We were born into a sin-filled, fallen world as a result of Adam’s choice back in the garden (Genesis 3:1-24).  Sin entered the world then, and ever since, we have all lived under this curse from his choice. 

“Therefore, just as sin came into the world through one man, and death through sin, and so death spread to all men because all sinned.”(Romans 5:12)

Without Jesus willingly humbling himself and dying on the cross, I would die remaining under that curse.  He lovingly traded the punishment I rightfully earned as a result of my sin for His righteousness.   The ultimate curse is hell, eternal torment and separation from God.

All my failures can play and replay in the video of my mind and leave me “stuck” in defeat.  It is important to recognize the source of our sin and failure.  They stem all the way back to the Garden of Eden.  Recognizing the source can help us effectively target a game plan to combat them.  These are the overriding truths of Scripture I am reminded of, even above all my mistakes, failures and poor decisions.

What Jesus Offers….

Jesus says Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.  Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.  For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”  (Matthew 11:28 -30 ESV)

Jesus extends His hands of help to us, offering to teach us what it means to live in a restful state in this life.

We are told to come.

I have to come “again and again”, all throughout my day!

I have to come to Him before my day has begun, asking Him to empower me through His Spirit to live as He desires.

I have to come to Him throughout the day for the desire to serve my children. 

I come again when I have no patience or gentleness in targeting their hearts during times of discipline. 

I come when it is easier to raise my voice and get the quicker end result of obedience.  

Again I come, when I don’t want to walk the longer and often repeated “better road” of sitting down and talking through a poor decision or disunity among them.

A Crossroads

I have to come to Jesus to love my husband as Christ desires me to love.  Naturally my love is self-centered and flawed.  

I have to ask Jesus to remake me when I would rather utter a snippy, quick remark rather than step back and consider the kind of day he might have had.  I have to come to Him again when my husband wants to do something I may not really be interested in doing at that moment.  

I recognize I have a choice, a crossroads perhaps.  Do I put him in front of myself or do I just choose myself instead?  Do I intentionally choose to see this as an investment in my marriage, or do I write it (and him) off?

I come again when I would choose to spend my afternoon working on my latest hobby or devouring a book, rather the follow the prompting on my heart to reach out to a friend.  

I come to Him asking Him to slow down my day, so I can encourage and engage this person He has placed right in front of me at this appointed time.  

I come having to ask Him to realign my priorities, recognizing Jesus is all about ministering to the hearts of people and meeting real needs, and not about helping me cross off MY agenda list for today.

Only in Jesus

Complete transparency here:  let me tell you, apart from Jesus, I will choose myself every time! 

EVERY TIME! 

With Jesus, He enables me to be able choose others.  “Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves.  Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.”  (Philippians 2:3-4)

As I come to Him, He alone is able to transform my self-centered heart into one like His.  In a way as only He can, I walk away filled with more joy and blessing from Him enabling me to choose the “other”. 

I can imagine you, too, have experienced this as well! 

The Lord supernaturally blesses the efforts of our day. He can seem to multiply our time when we offer it as a gift to another.  Somehow we find all the necessary tasks of the day completed and at times even excess time opening up.  There is almost no way to explain it, other than knowing it is purely a gift from Him. 

“Every good gift and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change.” (James 1:17)

Let us take heart in the “coming again and again” to the feet of Jesus!  This repetitive “coming” grows our dependency upon Him.  What a beautiful thing it can be as we learn to truly walk daily with Jesus!  Drawing from Him both the right heart attitude and strength in which to choose others.  

Based on the gift each one has received, use it to serve others, as good managers of the varied grace of God.  If anyone speaks, it should be as one who speaks God’s words; if anyone serves, it should be from the strength God provides, so that God may be glorified through Jesus Christ in everything.  To Him belong the glory and the power forever and ever.  Amen.”  (I Peter 4:10-11)  

Blessings as we continue on this journey with Him!