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practicing hospitality

“Share with the Lord’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality.” (Romans 12:13 ESV)

Practice is defined by the Webster’s 1828 Dictionary as “to do or perform frequently, customarily or habitually; to perform certain acts frequently or customarily, either for instruction, profit, or amusement”

When I hear the word practice, I think of many hours spent on the tennis court, with the ball machine, backboard, or buckets of balls.  Practicing my groundstrokes, my serve.  Why?  In hopes that through these hours of practice, my skills would improve. 

Knowing that in our practicing, ever so slowly our skills are refined.

I love how the Apostle Paul chooses to use the word “practice” in this reference. I appreciate what it entails.

We are not always going to “get it right”.  

This could apply to many things – the meal we prepare, our right heart attitude of inviting others into our homes, even our focus.  Am I more worried or distracted by cleaning the house and making it presentable or am I prayerfully considering the various avenues of conversation that the Lord may bring up in our time together?

In other words, how am I preparing my heart? 

It can be so easy to view hospitality as just the “event”, the two hour block of time we have guests in our home.

Could it be more than that though?

Could it even be more in the preparation beforehand, that is our hearts and minds, than the actual event? 

I think of Paul’s exhortation in 1 Cor 13:1-3.  “If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal.  And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing.  If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing.”

Three times he mentions doing spectacular, show-stopping things but if they are done without love…they are nothing.

NOTHING!

That is a heavy word to let sink in.

All my effort to clean, serve, actively listen and encourage.  

If love is not my overarching goal and focus, then everything else is obsolete.  

It has no value.  There is definitely no lasting or eternal value!

In this time beforehand, I have to remind myself of the importance of prayer and preparing my mind as He directs us. We are told in Phil 4:6-7 “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” 

May we seize this time as we are preparing our home and cooking to engage in combat…spiritual combat, that is.

The enemy is going to attempt to throw all at you he can to derail your purpose in this intentional opportunity to live out the Gospel.

Expect it!

He is going to lure you with reasons of “why this is a bad idea”, why tonight is just not turning out to be the “right night” for this, even interjecting selfish thoughts of how much work this has turned out to be or how much of your day you are giving up to do this.

Be encouraged that in our “not doing it all right” this may very well allow us to share of our greatest need of Jesus with our guests!

It can be easy for me to get caught up in a tizzy trying to coordinate pulling everything out of the oven at the same time, having enough “hands on deck” to set the table, pour drinks, set up enough chairs and get the food ready to serve. 

In this frenzy of activity, I find I can easily get snappy with my husband or kiddos.  I feel the Lord kindly opening my eyes to this more and more, and through His Spirit prayerfully remaking me in this area, but it still happens.  I am still very much a work in progress!

It can be so easy for our goal to be one of “perfection” rather than just being real.  I mess up, and respond with frustrated-laced words.  Those are times I feel I could just throw up my hands as if to say “why bother” with all of this?  If I cannot get it right with my family, how in the world can the Lord use us, if this outburst is the result of what truly lies in my heart?

Then I hear Him gently remind me, that I am that cracked pot, just an earthen vessel, desperately needing the filling of my Savior.   

But we have this treasure in jars of clay, to show that the surpassing power belongs to God and not to us.” (2 Corinthians 4:7).

I have to remind myself that in God’s economy, He uses the lesser things, the seemingly insignificant of this world.  

He can and will use us, despite ourselves, if we are just willing.  

This truth, friends, should cause our hearts to soar!

1 Cor 1: 26-31 “Brothers and sisters, think of what you were when you were called. Not many of you were wise by human standards; not many were influential; not many were of noble birth. But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong.  God chose the lowly things of this world and the despised things—and the things that are not—to nullify the things that are, so that no one may boast before him. It is because of him that you are in Christ Jesus, who has become for us wisdom from God—that is, our righteousness, holiness and redemption. Therefore, as it is written: “Let the one who boasts boast in the Lord.”

It can be hard to reprogram our “failures”; to see them as potential opportunities for the Lord to showcase His work, grace and forgiveness lived out in our own earthly relationships.

May I even offer that God might use these “real” moments of life to draw unbelievers to Himself even more than our “have it all togetherness”?

We can all relate to quick frustrations and harsh words uttered, but the conviction the Holy Spirit brings for restoration and forgiveness may be a completely new experience for unbelievers to witness.  His love in and through us empowers us to live out a love that the world cannot begin to fathom or understand, but is so longing to experience.  

Be prepared for their questions to come!  

Always be prepared to give an answerto everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect.” (I Pet 3:15 NIV)

Let us sift through these encouragements found in Scripture.  Allow them to remind us of where our true identity lies, in Jesus Christ, in what He has done for us on the cross.

We bring nothing to the table, but His deep love for us welcomes us as adopted sons and daughters” (Eph 1:5).  

If we ask the Holy Spirit to allow this truth to deeply penetrate our hearts, our very being, we will no doubt be transformed. 

Our strivings, our hospitality will not be a result of a “have to do” attitude, but rather one of being completely overwhelmed with what He has done for us on the cross.  Blessings to you this week, as we open our homes, our calendars and seek to display His love in the area of hospitality!

***If you would like to read through more of this topic on hospitality, there is a wonderful book written by Rosaria Butterfield entitled “The Gospel Comes with a House Key”